“Parent and Me Day”: Inspired by an Identical Twin Pediatrician
Introduction
The first few years of parenting twins are all about survival mode. Let’s be honest keeping twins on the same eating schedule, nap schedule, and timing every doctor’s appointment together is just easier for everyone involved. Life as a twin parent is full of hectic moments, and managing everything as a pair sometimes feels like the only way to keep up.
But as they’ve gotten older, I’ve realized how easy it is to stay in that habit, especially with same-gendered twins. Signing up for same sports, same activities, and buying similar clothes just simplifies things. But over time, I noticed that treating them as a unit, even unintentionally, meant less space for them to explore who they are as individuals.
I’m reminded of something a pediatrician, who is also an identical twin, shared with me when my boys were babies. I asked her what one piece of advice she’d give me as a twin parent, and she said, “My parents always had my sister and me in the same activities and sports. While I understand why they did it, I wish they had put us in separate things so we could have been seen more as individuals.” That piece of advice stuck with me and has become a guiding principle for how I approach parenting my twins.
That’s why, in our house, we have something called Parent and Me Day. Each month, we dedicate a day to spend 1:1 time with each twin letting them choose an activity that’s all about them. It’s a simple tradition that’s rewarding and helps our twins grow as individuals while strengthening the bond we all share. Here’s how Parent and Me Days work for us and why I think every twin family should give it a try.
1. It’s About Celebrating Individuality
Twins spend so much of their lives together, and that’s a beautiful thing. But it’s also easy for them to feel like part of a set rather than their own person. That’s where Parent and Me Days come in. Each twin gets to pick an activity that’s entirely about them to do with a parent. Whether it’s a trip to the park, a baking marathon, or exploring a new hobby, they get so excited knowing the day is just for them and their specific interests.
2. One-On-One Time Is a Game-Changer
Between school, homework, and life in general, finding quality one-on-one time with each twin can feel nearly impossible. That’s why Parent and Me Days are such a gift. For that day, my time, focus, and attention are fully on one kid while my husband’s is on the other. They open up, tell us things they wouldn’t necessarily share in the hustle of daily life, and we get to see them in their element.
3. It Empowers Them to Make Choices
One thing I’ve noticed since starting Parent and Me Days is how much it empowers my boys to express themselves. When it’s their turn to pick the activity, they get to take the lead and it’s wonderful to see how thoughtful and creative kids can be when given the chance. From crafting scavenger hunts to planning a day of mini golf, they love having the power to decide how the day goes.
For kids who spend a lot of time making decisions as part of a pair, giving them this solo decision-making time is huge. It builds confidence and teaches them that their voice matters, which I think is such an important life skill.
4. It’s About Us Too
While Parent and Me Days are all about celebrating individuality, they also strengthen our family bond in ways I didn’t expect. After each Parent and Me Day, we always come back together as a family. We talk about what we did, laugh about funny moments, and share ideas for what to do next time. It’s become a way for the boys to celebrate each other’s experiences, which helps reinforce their sibling connection.
5. It’s Easy to Make It a Routine
If this sounds like a lot to plan, I promise, it’s easier than it seems. We schedule every month, and once it’s on the calendar, it becomes something everyone looks forward to.
And here’s the thing: Parent and Me Days don’t have to be extravagant. Or even all day for that matter. It’s not about how big or fancy the activity is as it is about the quality one-on-one time and the memories you’re creating.
Conclusion
Parent and Me Days have become such a special part of our family life. They’re a way to celebrate my boys’ individuality, strengthen our bond, and create memories that we’ll all treasure for years to come. It’s incredible to watch them grow not only as individuals but also as siblings who cheer each other on.
So, if you’ve been looking for a way to celebrate your twins’ uniqueness while bringing your family closer, give Parent and Me Days a try. Share your favorite “Parent and Me” activities, ideas, or special moments with us on social media and using the hashtag #ParentAndMeDay. Let’s inspire each other with ways to celebrate the unique magic of raising twins!